Wednesday, July 16, 2014
8:50 a.m.
Duration: ten minutes
Location: On floor, no pillow. Priya on ottoman.
“I’m going to sit here and watch my lady for a second,” I say to myself. Her eyes are closed and she’s getting into it, but she looks frustrated and tired today. I close my eyes and the silhouette image of her body is burned into my mind at first. I stare at it until it leaves and then nothing. There is just the sound of my breath….. and the refrigerator. My mind stays dark for a little bit with nothing entering or leaving it. There’s no rush though on making sure I have some sort of revelation or great insight. Things come and go out of my mind as they please. Images start to enter and I remember our conversation this morning about goals. How do I plan to achieve them was one of the questions asked. My mind replays that scene quickly and then moves on. Moves on to nothing in particular just my breathing again. The cell phone makes a ding shortly thereafter. I’m annoyed because that ding broke my groove for just a minute. I was in the zone and then I hear this ding. My annoyance is short and I move on to just blankness in the mind. I hear the breath and just focus on it. “This feels like I’m getting ready to go to sleep again,” I say. “My hips are sore again.” My workouts have been tough and lately anytime I’ve sat in a cross legged position my IT band starts screaming at me right at the joint of my femur and hips. I’m tired of this soreness and I need to give my body a break.
The ding also also makes me aware of once again just how much a cell phone has infiltrated the many aspects of our lives. That a phone is so important to some that it needs to be on at all times and involved in every single thing they do. I love that the phone gives me and others the ability to communicate anywhere, anytime in seconds, but I also think it can create more stress too if not managed well.
Moments were the theme today. Moments of things going on, moments of darkness, moments of blankness, and moments of reflection on what has been talked about recently. Nothing profound happened, but everything is as it should be right now. I am exactly where I need to be right now.